I didn't watch The Force Awakens until a few weeks ago. I think I'm now at a point where I have chewed on the movie long enough by stepping away from it but it was recent enough to where I still remember the movie.
Movie release: 2015
Interest in movie: I'm a single male in my 20's so naturally I like Star Wars. Kidding. The original trilogy was a pretty big deal for me when I was really young, and the prequels, to a much lesser extent, excited me as well. Even a very childish version of me who saw Attack of the Clones in theaters was like "are you kidding me?" They waited an awfully long time to make a movie that was not a spin-off, but a direct continuation of a movie released many years prior. When I heard they were shoving in as many original cast members as possible I avoided the movie like the plague thinking that it was a soulless cash-in. I also heard a lot of people say that VII was really entertaining while other people said it was trash. Some people said "it's so good, it's just like A New Hope!!!" and others said "it's so bad, it's just like A New Hope!" I didn't have much interest in watching it, but my mom wanted me to watch it because "it had all the characters and it's awesome" which scared me even more. But honestly, this is not going to be a post bashing or particularly praising The Force Awakens, or for time's sake "VII", because I feel fairly neutral on the whole thing.
I'm just going to split this into 3 things I really liked about VII and 3 things I didn't like about 7. This way it isn't just a directionless rant. Now it will be a segmented directionless rant.
Oh also, this is going to have major spoilers. I'm serious. Huge spoilers that will break the experience of the movie for you if you haven't seen it yet. If you have seen it, keep going. If you haven't seen it, honestly I recommend watching it. If you haven't seen Episode IV, V, and VI, you should watch those before VII.
STUFF I LIKED ABOUT THE FORCE AWAKENS:
1: Daisy Ridley and Jon Boyega's performances and welcome inclusion as new characters
Star Wars is not only the biggest sci-fi franchise in existence, but it is also one of the biggest franchises in general. Star Wars is everywhere and everyone loves it basically. Cramming two new characters into a movie that is not supposed to be a spin-off was a risky move, and something I had very low expectations for. That's why when Rey and Finn come together and the plot actually starts developing naturally through these two strangers, it was actually refreshing and felt like a new movie. Beyond that, the actors gave life to these characters and made them feel like they weren't Luke Skywalker 2 and 3, because they aren't. Finn's whole "trying to be secretive but not doing a good job at it at all" thing throughout the movie rubbed me the wrong way, but overall his obliviousness to a lot of situations is a welcome character weakness and ends up being a strength into his growth as a character. Rey is a whole other field of awesome and I really wanted her to succeed. This could, again, just be because my expectations of Rey and Finn were incredibly low going in, but trying to keep an open mind throughout the movie, these actors in particular took me out of that mindset and strapped me in for the ride, which should be any actor's goal even in the face of hypothetically questionable direction.
2: It looks like fucking Star Wars, or at least what I wish Star Wars looked like
In my opinion, sometimes Star Wars as a universe can look really bland. It works in Episode IV, V, and VI, especially for their time period, but in some scenes it does strictly look like "jungle land", "desert land", "space battle", do you get the idea? There are a lot of scenes in VII that look like a desktop wallpaper for Star Wars in motion, and that is honestly something that I felt was missing from I, II, and possibly even III and maybe even VI. I know, it's blasphemy to say that IV, V, and VI aren't perfect cinema. Crucify me. Strap me by my wrists and ignite me. Don't even get me started on the fight between Rey and Kylo Ren either. My god that is one good looking snowy forest in motion. When Han approaches Ren, there is this really cool scene where a purple light is shining from outside onto the father and son and it really shows off why people call Star Wars a space opera. It does what an opera would do with a 4-minute musical segment in about 5 seconds with one moving image. It was reminiscent of Episode IV, V, and VI, looking back, but not in a way where I felt it was a rip-off as much as it was actively impressing me and shots like those to this day are what I think about the most whenever someone brings up VII. Even the desert scenes in the beginning set up the junk-filled world that Rey lives in like they tried to do in The Phantom Menace. Except that was The Phantom Menace so I don't have to explain much more. Not one character came out and said "Yo, Rey lives in some effed up ess bro!" Not once. It was set up in a way that doesn't show "this is a bad place to live" but rather what that slummy of a place means for Rey's character, all done through visuals... and a bit of dialogue but that's not a bad thing, it's a movie. The movie looks pretty. They could have made it all boring earth tones and made it "gritty" but they didn't. They showed the old Star Wars universe with a fresh coat of paint, and that's one of my favorite things about VII in general.
3: The old cast are vessel characters for a new plot
One of my main fears going into this movie was surprisingly nullified because they actually brought old characters into the path of Rey and Finn in a way that didn't feel like too far-fetched of a coincidence. If you think about it too hard then yeah, what luck that they would stumble into such situations to link them to Luke Skywalker and the gang. Can we call them "the gang?" But in context of the movie, it is all about portrayal, and I didn't find it distracting for the most part. Since Rey has a connection with older characters in the movie and that is part of her story as well as Luke's, Han's, Leia's, etc. it feels like a natural progression more than a cash-in. If anything, it would be disappointing at this point if Star Wars Episode VII was a movie that had a setting unaffected by the fall of the Empire. All of the characters they bring back have a purpose. I found the C-3PO and R2D2 introductions kind of jarring, but maybe that's just me. Han, Chewie, Leia, and Luke were all implemented in a way that I didn't feel short-changed... I mean I didn't pay to see the movie but you know what I mean.
STUFF I WAS NOT SO CRAZY ABOUT IN REGARDS TO THE FORCE AWAKENS
1: The "It's a New Hope Part 2" Debacle (kind of)
Let's get right into it then: The accusations that the plot of VII is a complete rehash of IV. Nobody is wrong here, in my opinion. These are all just opinions, who cares? You can think whatever makes you happy. I totally see where people are coming from with this accusation. I simultaneously agree and disagree, because that is the twisted way my brain works. And now for the elaboration. It's pretty obvious to anyone who has seen Episodes IV, V, and VI that some of the themes used in VII are eerily similar to what we have seen before. Say what you will about the prequels but at least they serve their functions as prequels without borrowing from the formulas set by the other movies. I however don't think it is as easy to pinpoint as "VII just rips off of A New Hope" though. I have a slightly different theory. For those of you unfamiliar with screenplay writing or story writing in general, which is a lot of people, even I myself am an amateur, it is a common rule of thumb that almost every story since the dawn of storytelling has three acts. I don't think this was intentional, but I feel like each act of VII is somehow a plug-and-chug version of a different movie in the original trilogy.
Start with A New Hope; the main culprit in everyone's accusations of why the plot in this movie is soulless, which I already stated that I don't fully agree with. Rey's origin story is pretty similar to Luke's, and the way Finn approaches Earth is nearly identical to R2D2 and C3P0's appearance in IV. But to say the whole movie copies off of the original movie is kind of a stretch. In what part of A New Hope did someone kill their own dad, or start fully becoming one with the powers of the Force? What? That didn't happen? Ohhhhhh. At the end of A New Hope, Luke is down one friend and a couple family members but becomes a sick-ass fighter pilot to take on the Empire. That didn't happen at the end of VII, but I guess you could argue that there is a similar bridge like this into the second act of VII. So I don't see VII Plot = IV Plot rather than VII First Act = Overly Condensed Version of IV Plot. See?
Next: Empire. Big family member reveal and all that, as well as the main Jedi character learning to wield the Force even though no one else knows how to do that anymore all happens in the 2nd act of VII. So this is me not really disagreeing as well. It would have taken maybe a couple weeks at most to make the story not so obviously safe and tried-true to the original trilogy plots, but they didn't do that because Disney. I'm assuming because Disney. Could be wrong. It's Disney. It even blows up a planet exactly like Alderaan. That scene looked cool and all, which I guess serves a very watered down metaphor for my feelings on the movie. "Yeah that was really cool, but from a writing standpoint, they already did all of this... all of it!"
I don't think I need to explain the parallels between VI and the third act of VII. That's just a big Death Star. Yeah, it's a planet, not the Death Star... but come the fuck on. It's a Death Star with a bigger dick. The dad death parallel isn't even subtle. He just kills him. The build-up doesn't even- oh- oh wait! This gets it's own damn section!
2: That one scene with Han Solo. You know the one.
One of my main fears about watching the movie was that they were going to butcher Han Solo, and to my surprise they didn't. If anything showing that even in old age and after aiding in the galaxy's salvation, he is still hunted down for being a crooked scumbag is refreshing and kind of funny in its own right. This is what Han was all about in the old movies and it serves as an evolved version of that. They even show more of a heart in Han with his scenes where he interacts directly with Leia and Ren. This further exemplifies his short but sweet relationship with Rey. Then an edge-lord fucking kills him. This could have been a poignant, brilliant scene, but it is done in the stupidest way. If Ren would have sneezed or something it would have at least been campy, but this is just stupid. For the record, I'm not pissed that Ren killed Han. Like I said above, it's all about portrayal. Execution and context are the two main things that make this shit work, and they threw both out the window. There is no reason to really love or hate Ren up to this point. He's an edgy teenager at his darkest moments and a whiny bitch at his softest, yet he is supposed to be the main villain. It's kind of a joke, in my opinion. This whole build-up scene where Han seems to be getting through to Ren is so almost good that it hurts me. He just blank-faced kills him. Then Han pulls a Darth Maul into the pit of nothingness below. Here's why this is really stupid, or rather stupidly portrayed, and its so simple that it's going to blow your mind... BLOW YOUR MIND... maybe not... here it is:
Why? Why would he do this? Nothing in the movie shows that Han is a great or terrible father to Ren. If anything the dialogue shows that Ren was just being an edgy bitch, as per his general character design, and how much that really has to do with Han was never shown. On the other hand, and this is people's argument against my point, it is supposed to show how dark and shit Ren is. Bullshit. A) Han was obviously no threat to Ren, so killing him was pointless as hell. If he was really the badass supervillain that Ren fans see him as, he would have seen Han's usefulness as leverage for the other original cast members or possibly even other scum bags across the galaxy. This could have brought a much more potent motive to kick off VIII without just using "a disturbance in the force" to bring Luke out of hiding. B) Even if it wasn't pointless, Ren spares at least one life when he could easily kill them just in the beginning half of the fucking movie. But yeah sure, he's just super edgy and doesn't give a fuck if his dad dies and that's what makes him "cool". I fucking hate Kylo Ren. Which leads to my next point!!!
3: God Characters
There are multiple characters that I consider to be "gods" for the wrong reasons and it ruins any semblance of a point that VII is trying to go for, if they were actually trying to go for anything other than a 2 billion dollar paycheck. These three characters in particular that I am going to be talking about are Kylo Ren (of course), Luke Skywalker (you saw that coming), and Rey Whatsherface (simultaneously my favorite and least favorite character in the movie).
I already pretty much stated why I hate Kylo Ren and why I think his inclusion in the movie is arguably lazier than C3PO's, but there is another personal pet peeve I have with Kylo Ren. He is the new Darth Vader simply for the sake of being the new Darth Vader, and the movie doesn't even try to cover it up. His origin story is thrown out on full display and it shows him as the badass pretty early into the movie, except he's not the badass in my opinion but whatever. So they expect us to believe that as a teenager, which we can assume from the context of the movie that he was a teenager, this son of a rogue thief was trained in the way of the Jedi by the god of Jedi and then decided "fuck you mom and dad, you just don't understand me! I'm going to go listen to AFI in space and build a space colony and a giant laser in the core of a fucking planet and kill everyone." That just happened? He just commands a bunch of people now because he's edgy. You could argue here that those people all belong to Snoke, but even then it wouldn't make any sense for Snoke to just be like "oh hey, yeah we can use you to kill people but ALSO you can command all my shit even though you have proven multiple times that you are too stupid and emotionally unstable to handle this position." Darth Vader had this relationship with Sidious/Palpatine but there was build-up there. In fact, despite your feelings on the prequels, all six movies before VII had an important hand in the legacy of Darth Vader so when he commands a space fleet, I can see that happening. Anakin is driven with purpose and is stubborn as shit in every single movie. Kylo Ren is like Shadow the Hedgehog mixed with Robbie Rotten. Does that sound like the worst thing ever? That's why I hate Kylo Ren.
Luke is not as bad of a god character because we actively witnessed him become a Jedi god in the original trilogy. However him being seen as a myth in a time period that wasn't really that long after the fall of the Empire seemed kind of stupid to me. Even his own sister acts like he's some legend that she sends an entire squadron to blindly seek out for years. Then at the end, finding him is the big climax of the movie that is supposed to lead to VIII, because we don't know what's going to happen. How is Luke going to react? That's cool and all but they just say like "we probably need Luke's help". There is no concrete reason why Luke is required to snuff out Lord Goth. Maybe in VIII there will be, but I doubt it.
Then there is Rey, who I love, but also hate for this reason. This also kind of falls on Finn too actually. Not that long ago, these two characters didn't know what a lightsaber was, no exaggeration. Rey picks it up and Luke (again, having power that makes no sense within the context given by Episodes I-VI) sends a huge vision to whoever just so happens to pick up his lightsaber that he hid in a box in some bar that they just happened to go to. Oh good. How convenient. Rey leaves it behind anyways. Also keep in mind that nobody up to this point has used a lightsaber except for Kylo Ren and no one has used the force in front of these characters except for Kylo Ren. Finn admits openly that he didn't even know that the lightsaber was a weapon and starts using it against enemies instantly. Not a big deal, but then later he fights the guy who is supposed to be the most powerful Sith guy in the galaxy at the time and holds his own. A DAY AGO, HE DIDN'T KNOW WHAT A LIGHTSABER FUCKING WAS! Why is this stupid? Other than the obvious? It took Luke Skywalker, Jedi god himself, a whole fucking movie to figure out how to use that thing. It was implied in the prequels that it took years to even be allowed to carry one of those things when the Jedi Council was intact. This guy is trained to be a Stormtrooper. You know, the guys who can't even aim a fucking gun and wear cardboard armor and have paper skin that makes them die to one laser shot or hard enough blow to the helmet. He's on Jedi level now too. Keep that in mind, and then look at Rey. She touched a lightsaber once and can now do Jedi mind tricks, use the Force telekinesis stuff, and she fights Kylo Ren too. This was a great fight scene and probably my favorite scene in the whole movie, really, but why would she be able to do this or know how to do half of the things she did. The force just courses through her so now she just knows how to do everything. They didn't that shit this bad in the Digimon anime, but when Digimon does it, it's lazy writing. When Star Wars does it, it's just the Force. In the words of Han Solo "That's not how the Force works!"... my second favorite scene in the whole movie.
OVERALL
The Force Awakens is a functioning movie with enough heart, actor enthusiasm, and welcoming setting to be entertaining. Saying I like it more than I and II is not saying much but I'm saying it. I don't know how I feel about it in regards to III. Obviously it doesn't touch the original trilogy, I honestly think that, but that doesn't make it a horribly lazy movie. I think it was a welcome continuation and with how overly hyped the movie was, there was no way that it wasn't going to be a major disappointment to everyone because it was a continuation of a trilogy of movies that redefined sci-fi and possibly film in general.
I don't fully know how I feel about this movie still because I don't think about it every single day. But any CALM and THOUGHT OUT and RELEVANT arguments for or against anything I said in this blog would be appreciated and personally interesting. That's how you write a run-on sentence.
1/23/2017
Me Whining About My Mental Health Again
Yaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyy..........
I've publicly said I have depression. "Everyone gets sad you fucking dingus!" I hear you say. That's not what I'm talking about here. Depression, as an actual disease, is different for everyone. For me, I have to convince myself on a daily basis that I am worthy to live on the same planet as the rest of you. Somehow you are all Dumbledore and I'm Dobby in my head, although society just sees two people in a room more or less. Every once in a while this becomes a full blown mental rampage where I cannot focus on anything because all I want to do is die. In this state, "I can't even" has a whole new scary and very real meaning.
I started having suicidal thoughts around the age of eleven although honestly I don't care when it started, I'm not writing an autobiography, this blog is a snore-fest enough as is. I would say I went about 2 months straight in mental stability recently. This is not to say I didn't think about dying because the vivid imagery of bathing myself in oil, lighter fluid, and then setting it all aflame is mildly entertaining, but I went 2 months thinking "fuck it, we are all human so if they have no purpose then neither do I". It was actually a lot more optimistic than that. I wasn't skipping down fields of roses, but I wasn't drinking NyQuil like jello shots either with a gun in and out of my mouth. Then this weekend was like "ay, fackkk you". I spent the past 42 hours or so trying to forget I exist. I spent about 13 of those hours asleep and another 14 playing Paper Mario. I like Paper Mario, but it didn't really make me happy, it was just, again, me trying to forget I exist and Paper Mario has an entertaining and non-imposing enough atmosphere to help with that.
My original plans for the weekend were maybe spend a few hours with some friends but mostly just knock out a bunch of productive shit. Whaddajoke!
A lot of people really don't understand this mentality, even some professionals, so the point of this post is not to say "woe is me" in a sad hope that you will feel something, but rather to give a new vantage point to something that you may not experience, or maybe you do experience and need validation that you're not a psycho. Well here it is. As often as I might tell myself that I'm worthless, psychotic, a sociopath, ugly, undesirable, miserable, pretentious, lazy, and stupid, at the very worst I am... probably only a really mild cocktail of those things but not the whole warehouse. Neither are you. We all have flaws and reflecting on them is healthy but beating yourself up over them isn't. Take it from someone who used to actually physically beat themselves up because I couldn't live up to my parents' fairly standard expectations and everyone else had something called sex except me. I was a very bland, stupid teenager, good lord, being an adult is so much cooler. Whoever reads this that is still in high school, ignore every sad motherfucker that tries to tell you that high school is the best time of your life. Holy shit!
Back on topic, why did I post this now? If my depression and constant mental bickering with my own psyche has been a constant for over a decade then what inspired this schlock? I wanted to be productive this weekend. This year in general I decided I wanted to be more focused on a few things I wanted to do rather than last year's giant web of whatever-I-want. Yesterday I was like "well, you're a noob at writing and drawing, and you were never really that good at either to begin with. People probably just told you that in the past to make you stop being a whiny bitch."
ME: Well, then I guess I should just work on mixing the album.
DEPRESSION ME: Why? So you can pretend you know how to mix some more? Or are you going to fuck with new stuff in Reaper again for 5 seconds, realize its not like Pro Tools, and then get pissed and stop like a little bitch?
ME: That's not fair... but I mean... I've been coming up with some ideas for new music maybe. That could be cool. Maybe even a little fun. People really like music. I could give them music and we could all music together.
DEPRESSION ME: Boooo!!! Your music blows, bro! Nobody even likes your shit and they never will!!!
ME: Well, now I'm too sad to record then... so um... drawing?
DEPRESSION ME: Bitch, please!
ME: But I want to do something productive.
DEPRESSION ME: You just want recognition because you're petty. All of your so called "creative projects" are just you stroking your own ego, and even then, because I'm here, you are way too much of a freak for strangers or even people you know to really care at all about anything you make, let alone appreciate it. Also you suck at singing. Like a lot. Also the ugly and single thing, but you already knew that because we talk about that every day when you wake up and when you go to bed.
ME: Eh, fair point. Let's play Sonic.
[I play Sonic Adventure 2 for 2 hours]
ME: Back to work then.
DEPRESSION ME: Fuck you!
ME: Orrrr Paper Mario!
Every time I went back to the computer was a similar argument, so I just went into the other room and played non-stop Paper Mario. It's 1:40 in the morning right now and I'm thinking about turning on the 64 again. But I won't. I mean, that's a really good game though, oh my god, but that's not the point. We should be honest with ourselves about our own feelings.
We Google things we need help with. Some of us with mental issues, diagnosed or not, will do the same thing. Or at least you should, that's what lead me to go get officially diagnosed. Trying to clear your mental issues without consulting a professional is like trying to shoot the thing that blows up the Death Star without cross-hairs. A lot of the stuff online can be helpful. It really can. When I'm just shot down with it, sometimes I will just look up sob stories like this one or documented ways to cope. One of those methods is having a real strong support system, like friends and family. Here's the deal though: they are people too, so you can't keep toilet-papering them, and sometimes, even if they're cool with helping you as much as possible, sometimes your friends have, um, I dunno, THEIR OWN FUCKING LIVES TO ATTEND TO! Don't be clingy. Also be aware though, that sometimes, you probably just think you are being a burden, but you are not actually being a burden. Thinking you are a burden can actually be more a burden to the person taking on your burden than what you thought was originally a burden. Woah. I should have slowed that line down, some of you are reading this at like 2am. Some of you are drunk. Some of you are making me jealous.
Your friends won't always be there, and for some of you that's where family kicks in, but for the rest of us that live on the more AMC side of reality, no chance in hell. For those of you who live on my side of reality, family is almost completely meaningless. Its traditional purposes hang on a thread. A thread that is supporting a trapeze artist who has mice chomping on his/her exposed ankles. Anyways. This doesn't mean your friends are assholes: they have many other ways to prove to you that they are assholes but not being there to talk for every time you think about boobs is not one of the things that make them an asshole. It only makes them a modern human. What do you do in these situations then? Stop being the victim.
NOTE: Stop being the victim DOES NOT equal "man up" or "stop being a pussy" or "go talk to Jesus about it because you are incapable of making your own decisions" (although if you have found a way in your life to make religion actually work for you in this context then that is actually pretty rad and you should keep doing that too). When I say "stop being the victim", I mean look at how I personified depression up above there. Make depression your step stool bitch like it has done to you for way too long now. Even when its more chemical components kick in and you feel unable to do pretty much anything, don't be destructive, but be assertive. I played Paper Mario today knowing that I would come out of this stronger, or at least that's what I blindly believed and it worked. I wasn't playing Paper Mario and closing myself off from the rest of the world waiting for an excuse to finally kill myself, because that wouldn't really solve anything, it would just add to the body count. If you feel your entire life is a problem, then solve it, don't selfishly get rid of it. Also realize though that this is futile, and we all die alone, but that doesn't have to be a bad thing. It's a human thing.
Draw alongside that YouTube tutorial that has been festering in that playlist for 6 months knowing with full confidence that a truck could paralyze you from the legs down tomorrow. Go out on a date with your friend's friend knowing just how possible it is to sneeze in her food and later misread a signal and do something that turns you into a textbook creeper! Crawl around with me and everyone else in this beautiful world that feeds on flaws, and turn your flaws into something we can all breathe on, remembering that you are partially doing it for your own self-worth and that someone could gouge out your eyes because of bad traffic. By realizing that none of the stuff you worry about is worth worrying about, you find purpose, because you find why you worry.
You think worrying about those things makes you a pussy? It makes you a hero! All of the people I have tried to work with in the past and ended up ditching because I couldn't deal with them anymore either didn't have worry or worried just so you would notice them worrying. Don't be either of those people. You care so much about wanting to better yourself and to fulfill your goals that you marathon'd Twilight movies next to your stuffed animals because you have been single for so long, you aren't sure if you can put yourself out there in a romantic light ever again. Isn't that great? You felt shame for your past decisions, but not regret, and your worries beat out the insecurities of whatever asshole left you out in the cold. Sulk in confidence that this is a cocoon state; a metamorphosis, not the catatonic thing from Empire Strikes Back, even if it feels that way and you look in the mirror and see present-day Harrison Ford.
That's probably the best note to end it on right? Basically if there is anything to take from this, it is that someone else, in some vague sense, is feeling your pain, and even if you are alone on a technical level, it isn't forever, and with texting and the internet, it will probably last a few hours, tops. If you are trying to accomplish something that makes you feel like you trying to do something in general, as vague and hokey as that sounds, I think you're doing awesome and have mad respect for you already. No, really.
Another good depression tip: consistent sleep is better than more sleep. A week of 5, 5, 5, 5, 5, 5, 5 is healthier for your brain than hours that look like 7, 8, 4, 10, 12, 3 and day of napping, 9. This also includes depriving yourself of sleep and blogging at 2 in the morning like a goob.
I've publicly said I have depression. "Everyone gets sad you fucking dingus!" I hear you say. That's not what I'm talking about here. Depression, as an actual disease, is different for everyone. For me, I have to convince myself on a daily basis that I am worthy to live on the same planet as the rest of you. Somehow you are all Dumbledore and I'm Dobby in my head, although society just sees two people in a room more or less. Every once in a while this becomes a full blown mental rampage where I cannot focus on anything because all I want to do is die. In this state, "I can't even" has a whole new scary and very real meaning.
I started having suicidal thoughts around the age of eleven although honestly I don't care when it started, I'm not writing an autobiography, this blog is a snore-fest enough as is. I would say I went about 2 months straight in mental stability recently. This is not to say I didn't think about dying because the vivid imagery of bathing myself in oil, lighter fluid, and then setting it all aflame is mildly entertaining, but I went 2 months thinking "fuck it, we are all human so if they have no purpose then neither do I". It was actually a lot more optimistic than that. I wasn't skipping down fields of roses, but I wasn't drinking NyQuil like jello shots either with a gun in and out of my mouth. Then this weekend was like "ay, fackkk you". I spent the past 42 hours or so trying to forget I exist. I spent about 13 of those hours asleep and another 14 playing Paper Mario. I like Paper Mario, but it didn't really make me happy, it was just, again, me trying to forget I exist and Paper Mario has an entertaining and non-imposing enough atmosphere to help with that.
My original plans for the weekend were maybe spend a few hours with some friends but mostly just knock out a bunch of productive shit. Whaddajoke!
A lot of people really don't understand this mentality, even some professionals, so the point of this post is not to say "woe is me" in a sad hope that you will feel something, but rather to give a new vantage point to something that you may not experience, or maybe you do experience and need validation that you're not a psycho. Well here it is. As often as I might tell myself that I'm worthless, psychotic, a sociopath, ugly, undesirable, miserable, pretentious, lazy, and stupid, at the very worst I am... probably only a really mild cocktail of those things but not the whole warehouse. Neither are you. We all have flaws and reflecting on them is healthy but beating yourself up over them isn't. Take it from someone who used to actually physically beat themselves up because I couldn't live up to my parents' fairly standard expectations and everyone else had something called sex except me. I was a very bland, stupid teenager, good lord, being an adult is so much cooler. Whoever reads this that is still in high school, ignore every sad motherfucker that tries to tell you that high school is the best time of your life. Holy shit!
Back on topic, why did I post this now? If my depression and constant mental bickering with my own psyche has been a constant for over a decade then what inspired this schlock? I wanted to be productive this weekend. This year in general I decided I wanted to be more focused on a few things I wanted to do rather than last year's giant web of whatever-I-want. Yesterday I was like "well, you're a noob at writing and drawing, and you were never really that good at either to begin with. People probably just told you that in the past to make you stop being a whiny bitch."
ME: Well, then I guess I should just work on mixing the album.
DEPRESSION ME: Why? So you can pretend you know how to mix some more? Or are you going to fuck with new stuff in Reaper again for 5 seconds, realize its not like Pro Tools, and then get pissed and stop like a little bitch?
ME: That's not fair... but I mean... I've been coming up with some ideas for new music maybe. That could be cool. Maybe even a little fun. People really like music. I could give them music and we could all music together.
DEPRESSION ME: Boooo!!! Your music blows, bro! Nobody even likes your shit and they never will!!!
ME: Well, now I'm too sad to record then... so um... drawing?
DEPRESSION ME: Bitch, please!
ME: But I want to do something productive.
DEPRESSION ME: You just want recognition because you're petty. All of your so called "creative projects" are just you stroking your own ego, and even then, because I'm here, you are way too much of a freak for strangers or even people you know to really care at all about anything you make, let alone appreciate it. Also you suck at singing. Like a lot. Also the ugly and single thing, but you already knew that because we talk about that every day when you wake up and when you go to bed.
ME: Eh, fair point. Let's play Sonic.
[I play Sonic Adventure 2 for 2 hours]
ME: Back to work then.
DEPRESSION ME: Fuck you!
ME: Orrrr Paper Mario!
Every time I went back to the computer was a similar argument, so I just went into the other room and played non-stop Paper Mario. It's 1:40 in the morning right now and I'm thinking about turning on the 64 again. But I won't. I mean, that's a really good game though, oh my god, but that's not the point. We should be honest with ourselves about our own feelings.
We Google things we need help with. Some of us with mental issues, diagnosed or not, will do the same thing. Or at least you should, that's what lead me to go get officially diagnosed. Trying to clear your mental issues without consulting a professional is like trying to shoot the thing that blows up the Death Star without cross-hairs. A lot of the stuff online can be helpful. It really can. When I'm just shot down with it, sometimes I will just look up sob stories like this one or documented ways to cope. One of those methods is having a real strong support system, like friends and family. Here's the deal though: they are people too, so you can't keep toilet-papering them, and sometimes, even if they're cool with helping you as much as possible, sometimes your friends have, um, I dunno, THEIR OWN FUCKING LIVES TO ATTEND TO! Don't be clingy. Also be aware though, that sometimes, you probably just think you are being a burden, but you are not actually being a burden. Thinking you are a burden can actually be more a burden to the person taking on your burden than what you thought was originally a burden. Woah. I should have slowed that line down, some of you are reading this at like 2am. Some of you are drunk. Some of you are making me jealous.
Your friends won't always be there, and for some of you that's where family kicks in, but for the rest of us that live on the more AMC side of reality, no chance in hell. For those of you who live on my side of reality, family is almost completely meaningless. Its traditional purposes hang on a thread. A thread that is supporting a trapeze artist who has mice chomping on his/her exposed ankles. Anyways. This doesn't mean your friends are assholes: they have many other ways to prove to you that they are assholes but not being there to talk for every time you think about boobs is not one of the things that make them an asshole. It only makes them a modern human. What do you do in these situations then? Stop being the victim.
NOTE: Stop being the victim DOES NOT equal "man up" or "stop being a pussy" or "go talk to Jesus about it because you are incapable of making your own decisions" (although if you have found a way in your life to make religion actually work for you in this context then that is actually pretty rad and you should keep doing that too). When I say "stop being the victim", I mean look at how I personified depression up above there. Make depression your step stool bitch like it has done to you for way too long now. Even when its more chemical components kick in and you feel unable to do pretty much anything, don't be destructive, but be assertive. I played Paper Mario today knowing that I would come out of this stronger, or at least that's what I blindly believed and it worked. I wasn't playing Paper Mario and closing myself off from the rest of the world waiting for an excuse to finally kill myself, because that wouldn't really solve anything, it would just add to the body count. If you feel your entire life is a problem, then solve it, don't selfishly get rid of it. Also realize though that this is futile, and we all die alone, but that doesn't have to be a bad thing. It's a human thing.
Draw alongside that YouTube tutorial that has been festering in that playlist for 6 months knowing with full confidence that a truck could paralyze you from the legs down tomorrow. Go out on a date with your friend's friend knowing just how possible it is to sneeze in her food and later misread a signal and do something that turns you into a textbook creeper! Crawl around with me and everyone else in this beautiful world that feeds on flaws, and turn your flaws into something we can all breathe on, remembering that you are partially doing it for your own self-worth and that someone could gouge out your eyes because of bad traffic. By realizing that none of the stuff you worry about is worth worrying about, you find purpose, because you find why you worry.
You think worrying about those things makes you a pussy? It makes you a hero! All of the people I have tried to work with in the past and ended up ditching because I couldn't deal with them anymore either didn't have worry or worried just so you would notice them worrying. Don't be either of those people. You care so much about wanting to better yourself and to fulfill your goals that you marathon'd Twilight movies next to your stuffed animals because you have been single for so long, you aren't sure if you can put yourself out there in a romantic light ever again. Isn't that great? You felt shame for your past decisions, but not regret, and your worries beat out the insecurities of whatever asshole left you out in the cold. Sulk in confidence that this is a cocoon state; a metamorphosis, not the catatonic thing from Empire Strikes Back, even if it feels that way and you look in the mirror and see present-day Harrison Ford.
That's probably the best note to end it on right? Basically if there is anything to take from this, it is that someone else, in some vague sense, is feeling your pain, and even if you are alone on a technical level, it isn't forever, and with texting and the internet, it will probably last a few hours, tops. If you are trying to accomplish something that makes you feel like you trying to do something in general, as vague and hokey as that sounds, I think you're doing awesome and have mad respect for you already. No, really.
Another good depression tip: consistent sleep is better than more sleep. A week of 5, 5, 5, 5, 5, 5, 5 is healthier for your brain than hours that look like 7, 8, 4, 10, 12, 3 and day of napping, 9. This also includes depriving yourself of sleep and blogging at 2 in the morning like a goob.
1/15/2017
Only Games I Give a Crap About for 2017
On this blog we here talk about the games. Ohhh yes! I'm kind of a stickler for game innovation (which is good, because games be expensive) but even then there's some pretty actually cool looking stuff coming this year so let's talk about the games that I'm even remotely interested in for 2017!
NIDHOGG 2
Around Christmas I finally played Nidhogg and it is pretty fun. It proves you don't need complexities and state-of-the-art graphics to end up with a fun game. Nidhogg 2 takes all of the principles that made Nidhogg fun and gives it some minor complexities and updated graphics. I think adding more to Nidhogg would make it much more appealing to a wider audience, myself included, and it looks like Nidhogg 2 is already on the right track.
PROJECT SONIC 2017
This one is dumb to put on here because they still haven't said much about this game in general but I'm still blindly excited for a new 3D Sonic that (hopefully) doesn't blow dick. I'm still not sure why Classic Sonic is back with Modern Sonic in the same game, seems fishy, but so was Generations's entire plot, and that game was awesome.
MARVEL VS CAPCOM: INFINITE
Marvel vs Capcom is one of my favorite fighting series ever, except I suck at it. I'm curious where they are going to go with the roster this time around (already curious about the new characters Mega Man X and Captain Marvel) and how deep the Infinity Stone system goes. I'm skeptical because I didn't like MvC3 as much as the others, and the game seems to have the same visual style and pacing of MvC3, but maybe Capcom will actually give a shit about customer feedback for a change and fix what made those games somewhat subpar. Or just make a whole new experience, but it looks like they already threw that out the window. Either way, we have more on this game to go off of than we do Project Sonic 2017, hence its placement on the list.
THE LEGEND OF ZELDA: BREATH OF THE WILD
I haven't been this excited for a Zelda game since Ocarina of Time was a fairly new game on the market. Breath of the Wild takes a few elements from previously existing adventure games, especially a lot of modern ones, but the new trailer shows them in a new light that somehow screams Zelda. I am also really excited to see what they do with full voice acting segments in the game. The trailer, in my opinion, makes it seem like a really natural transition, and I think the Zelda franchise was due for some resuscitation.
SHINESS: THE LIGHTNING KINGDOM
Some game I found on Steam. It looks really cute and it's kind of sort of open-world, action RPG, but with more platformer elements it looks like??? I don't know how to explain why this game looks so good but if you look at what they have public on Steam, hopefully you can see it too. It looks like the kind of game that I would have wanted to exist as a kid.
KINGDOM HEARTS 2.8 HD FINAL CHAPTER PROLOGUE
This comes out really soon, and yes that is its real title. Kingdom Hearts 2.8 contains three main attractions: Back Cover, which I think is some fully cinematic thing explaining more confusing shit in the Kingdom Hearts universe, a full HD remaster of Kingdom Hearts 3D: Dream Drop Distance, and a whole new chapter that ties the ending of Birth By Sleep to Kingdom Hearts III called A Fragmentary Passage. I already have this on pre-order so the hype is pretty real and I have already accepted it. I heard that A Fragmentary Passage is actually only going to last about as long as one of the worlds in the main games, but look up a trailer and tell me it doesn't look impressive to some degree. Even if A Fragmentary Passage is a total letdown, it still has a gameplay engine that will be foreshadowing for Kingdom Hearts III, a plot that ties together more shit for fans like me, and the main disc will still have a full HD remaster of Dream Drop Distance, so I can't complain. I mean, if you've seen my channel, you know I probably can, but to a more minimalist degree.
SONIC MANIA
Sonic Mania is a game that I already love and hate. I hate it because they are obviously playing off of nostalgia by taking large graphical and stage design influences from Sonic 1, 2, 3, S&K, and Sonic CD, but at the same time the game looks really pretty and seems to play pretty solid. In a more modern setting I'm curious to see what the full package has to offer, and I also hear it is going to have a butt-ton of stages, so I'm in for the ride.
PIT PEOPLE
After getting into Steam, two natural games I had to get were Castle Crashers and BattleBlock Theater. Afterwards I discovered Pit People, also made by Behemoth, was coming out this year. It's already in early access and I just haven't played it yet, but I'm debating getting it in early access or just waiting for it to come out in full. Either way it has Will Stamper and all of the goofiness I like of the other games in a turn-based setting, so it can't be a letdown. It pretty much just can't be a letdown.
YOOKA-LAYLEE
Duh. This is a game made by a lot of the creators of Banjo-Kazooie. Since Rare owns the rights to Banjo-Kazooie and Microsoft owns Rare, and Rare won't greenlight a Banjo-Threeie, Yooka-Laylee is the next best thing. Already it is familiar enough to be appreciated but unique enough to be commendable, and all that is out so far are some trailers and a demo showing a lot of graphical assets in the game. Yooka-Laylee already seems to be a lot bigger in terms of map size, but not in an empty way. The demo has you ascend to some pretty large heights, and even then you can see a whole other half of the map from the peak. If you have no nostalgia-blindness for Banjo-Kazooie but you are really into platformers, you need to at least go check it out.
KINGDOM HEARTS III
I have no excuses. Kingdom Hearts on a personal level is just a series that always pulls me out of, or at least pacifies, bad moods. Kingdom Hearts III will be the end of the saga according to Tetsuya Nomura and after playing pretty much every other game in the series and diving into the plot, it seems stupid to pass up Kingdom Hearts III. In fact, KHIII is one of the only reasons I bought a PS4 in the first place. The exciting thing for me about Kingdom Hearts is the fact that each game has similar enough combat for you to feel like you already understand a new installment, but has different intricacies that keep you awake even after sinking hundreds of hours into Kingdom Hearts II, Chain, and Dream Drop Distance... not that I've done those things... ahem... I have been purposefully avoiding trailers or leaks or rumors or whatever on this game because this has been a long time coming and I want the game to blow me away out of the casing, not be a checklist of things I'm expecting. I know that naivety is much harder to keep in this generation of games, but I hope it will be worth the extra effort.
What games are you excited for in 2017? Just kidding. I know it's Mario Odyssey and I don't care.
But what are your thoughts on these games? Let me know in los commentos. I'm pretty positive that is not Spanish.
NIDHOGG 2
Around Christmas I finally played Nidhogg and it is pretty fun. It proves you don't need complexities and state-of-the-art graphics to end up with a fun game. Nidhogg 2 takes all of the principles that made Nidhogg fun and gives it some minor complexities and updated graphics. I think adding more to Nidhogg would make it much more appealing to a wider audience, myself included, and it looks like Nidhogg 2 is already on the right track.
PROJECT SONIC 2017
This one is dumb to put on here because they still haven't said much about this game in general but I'm still blindly excited for a new 3D Sonic that (hopefully) doesn't blow dick. I'm still not sure why Classic Sonic is back with Modern Sonic in the same game, seems fishy, but so was Generations's entire plot, and that game was awesome.
MARVEL VS CAPCOM: INFINITE
Marvel vs Capcom is one of my favorite fighting series ever, except I suck at it. I'm curious where they are going to go with the roster this time around (already curious about the new characters Mega Man X and Captain Marvel) and how deep the Infinity Stone system goes. I'm skeptical because I didn't like MvC3 as much as the others, and the game seems to have the same visual style and pacing of MvC3, but maybe Capcom will actually give a shit about customer feedback for a change and fix what made those games somewhat subpar. Or just make a whole new experience, but it looks like they already threw that out the window. Either way, we have more on this game to go off of than we do Project Sonic 2017, hence its placement on the list.
THE LEGEND OF ZELDA: BREATH OF THE WILD
I haven't been this excited for a Zelda game since Ocarina of Time was a fairly new game on the market. Breath of the Wild takes a few elements from previously existing adventure games, especially a lot of modern ones, but the new trailer shows them in a new light that somehow screams Zelda. I am also really excited to see what they do with full voice acting segments in the game. The trailer, in my opinion, makes it seem like a really natural transition, and I think the Zelda franchise was due for some resuscitation.
SHINESS: THE LIGHTNING KINGDOM
Some game I found on Steam. It looks really cute and it's kind of sort of open-world, action RPG, but with more platformer elements it looks like??? I don't know how to explain why this game looks so good but if you look at what they have public on Steam, hopefully you can see it too. It looks like the kind of game that I would have wanted to exist as a kid.
KINGDOM HEARTS 2.8 HD FINAL CHAPTER PROLOGUE
This comes out really soon, and yes that is its real title. Kingdom Hearts 2.8 contains three main attractions: Back Cover, which I think is some fully cinematic thing explaining more confusing shit in the Kingdom Hearts universe, a full HD remaster of Kingdom Hearts 3D: Dream Drop Distance, and a whole new chapter that ties the ending of Birth By Sleep to Kingdom Hearts III called A Fragmentary Passage. I already have this on pre-order so the hype is pretty real and I have already accepted it. I heard that A Fragmentary Passage is actually only going to last about as long as one of the worlds in the main games, but look up a trailer and tell me it doesn't look impressive to some degree. Even if A Fragmentary Passage is a total letdown, it still has a gameplay engine that will be foreshadowing for Kingdom Hearts III, a plot that ties together more shit for fans like me, and the main disc will still have a full HD remaster of Dream Drop Distance, so I can't complain. I mean, if you've seen my channel, you know I probably can, but to a more minimalist degree.
SONIC MANIA
Sonic Mania is a game that I already love and hate. I hate it because they are obviously playing off of nostalgia by taking large graphical and stage design influences from Sonic 1, 2, 3, S&K, and Sonic CD, but at the same time the game looks really pretty and seems to play pretty solid. In a more modern setting I'm curious to see what the full package has to offer, and I also hear it is going to have a butt-ton of stages, so I'm in for the ride.
PIT PEOPLE
After getting into Steam, two natural games I had to get were Castle Crashers and BattleBlock Theater. Afterwards I discovered Pit People, also made by Behemoth, was coming out this year. It's already in early access and I just haven't played it yet, but I'm debating getting it in early access or just waiting for it to come out in full. Either way it has Will Stamper and all of the goofiness I like of the other games in a turn-based setting, so it can't be a letdown. It pretty much just can't be a letdown.
YOOKA-LAYLEE
Duh. This is a game made by a lot of the creators of Banjo-Kazooie. Since Rare owns the rights to Banjo-Kazooie and Microsoft owns Rare, and Rare won't greenlight a Banjo-Threeie, Yooka-Laylee is the next best thing. Already it is familiar enough to be appreciated but unique enough to be commendable, and all that is out so far are some trailers and a demo showing a lot of graphical assets in the game. Yooka-Laylee already seems to be a lot bigger in terms of map size, but not in an empty way. The demo has you ascend to some pretty large heights, and even then you can see a whole other half of the map from the peak. If you have no nostalgia-blindness for Banjo-Kazooie but you are really into platformers, you need to at least go check it out.
KINGDOM HEARTS III
I have no excuses. Kingdom Hearts on a personal level is just a series that always pulls me out of, or at least pacifies, bad moods. Kingdom Hearts III will be the end of the saga according to Tetsuya Nomura and after playing pretty much every other game in the series and diving into the plot, it seems stupid to pass up Kingdom Hearts III. In fact, KHIII is one of the only reasons I bought a PS4 in the first place. The exciting thing for me about Kingdom Hearts is the fact that each game has similar enough combat for you to feel like you already understand a new installment, but has different intricacies that keep you awake even after sinking hundreds of hours into Kingdom Hearts II, Chain, and Dream Drop Distance... not that I've done those things... ahem... I have been purposefully avoiding trailers or leaks or rumors or whatever on this game because this has been a long time coming and I want the game to blow me away out of the casing, not be a checklist of things I'm expecting. I know that naivety is much harder to keep in this generation of games, but I hope it will be worth the extra effort.
What games are you excited for in 2017? Just kidding. I know it's Mario Odyssey and I don't care.
But what are your thoughts on these games? Let me know in los commentos. I'm pretty positive that is not Spanish.
1/13/2017
Favorite Games I Played in 2016
Not all of these came out in 2016, but some did. I've always wanted to do something like this but doing it in video form felt pointless. A video on "these are games I played, maybe you'll think they are cool too" isn't very profound, but it's kind of perfect for a blog.
SLY COOPER: THIEVES IN TIME (PS3, 2013)
On my channel I reviewed the original Sly Cooper trilogy and felt lazy not doing Thieves in Time. I borrowed a copy from my friend and although I haven't finished the review for the game, I will come out and say that I actually enjoyed it a lot. I gave a pretty harsh review on Sly 2 and Sly 3 for their tedium and strange design choices. Sly 4 got rid of a lot of that. Since Sly 2 and 3 were walking on a thin line between monotony and quick strategy anyways, the changes were subtle but important. Not a lot of 3D platformers come out anymore due to the trend of 2D procedural generation games out now, so Thieves in Time was refreshing and although it's an unpopular opinion it might be my favorite in the franchise. I don't know though, Sly 1 was pretty cool.
ARAGAMI (PC, 2016)
At the end of 2016, I started getting into Steam, and my friends and I were looking for games to play online together since I might be moving away from their area fairly soon. I convinced my friends to try out Aragami since I was instantly drawn to its art style (and most of what they were suggesting were games that I wasn't very interested in, i.e. bland pseudo-realism shooters and horror games). I'm not super into PC gaming but Aragami, of all games, showed me its power. Aragami is a plot-centered stealth game, but instead of taking out bad guys with a gun in a boring industrial building, Aragami is set in lush cel-shaded environments and your primary weapon is a sword. You play as a mysterious creature called an Aragami who has been summoned by a captured princess to save her from her prison. Aragami has the typical WASD movement key binding of most PC games with shift sprinting and control crouching, but the space bar is used for certain shadow-based abilities that your character can use. The reason this works so well on PC is that you can aim with a mouse. Obviously you don't need to aim your sword but you can use shadow abilities to teleport to darker areas in your field of vision, even if it means scaling a wall. Speed and precision in your methods are crucial and this is so easy to do with a mouse that I can't fathom using a controller. Also Aragami is really pretty, has a fun enough plot, and is surprisingly fun to play co-op (two of you are Aragamis and you go through the story together). Aragami: it's pretty cool. There's an in-depth review.
SUPER MONKEY BALL (GC, 2001)
I have been playing Super Monkey Ball 2 for years but never owned a copy, just kept borrowing it from family. My sister ordered Super Monkey Ball for me as a Christmas gift (fun story, she thought she ordered SMB2 but the cover art is nearly identical so accidentally got me SMB1, but I'm not complaining). Super Monkey Ball is one of the first true physics-based puzzle games, or at least the first I'm aware of, and it plays as such. You push a monkey through various puzzles set up by the game in a certain order and see how far you can make it. Each puzzle gives you either 30 or 60 seconds to get to the goal, ramping up in difficulty (in theory) as you progress. Super Monkey Ball doesn't have as many memorable or impressive stages as Super Monkey Ball 2 does but it has tighter cornering which can be the difference between life and death when your main character moves in a big slippery ball. Admittedly, I also come back to Super Monkey Ball for the mini-games. I am significantly better at Monkey Billiards than I am at real life billiards.
BATTLEBLOCK THEATER (PC, 2013-2014)
Yeah, I just now got around to BattleBlock Theater. Another steam purchase that I have been meaning to try out for a long time and since it was on sale (bundled with Castle Crashers as well) I just decided to go for it. I have not been this pleasantly surprised with a 2D platformer in a long time. BattleBlock Theater is essentially LittleBigPlanet but more engaging and action-heavy. This isn't to say that it is better than the LittleBigPlanet games, just different. I always explain it to my friends that way and they think I'm saying that LittleBigPlanet blows in comparison to BattleBlock Theater and that is absolutely not what I'm trying to say. That's just like comparing different kinds of apples. BattleBlock's narrator is Will Stamper (Fairy Wish Prince, PeePee's Gay House, Potato Salad) which makes the game even more enjoyable for me. This was one of my main drawing points to the game, which is sad, but it absolutely brings a whole new personality to the game. Even without Stamper or the hilarious dialogue in general, BattleBlock Theater still looks like BattleBlock Theater. It's a unique and cutthroat experience that I recommend to everyone with a Steam account who likes pissing off their friends. BattleBlock is enjoyable alone as well, don't get me wrong. A lot of multiplayer games focus on multiplayer and disregard solo play, and other games do the exact opposite. BattleBlock is obviously more open for multiplayer but accommodates both.
POKKEN TOURNAMENT (Wii U, 2016)
Pokken Tournament is the answer to all of the Pokemon fans who have been asking for a game where you can have active combat with Pokemon, except made by the creators of Tekken. Pokken in this case is as simple or technical as you make it in a way. Going in blind is fun, but knowing a character forwards and backwards is also beneficial, and it can honestly be played either way. The story mode blows, plain and simple, but the gameplay is so well-designed and fun that I can't knock the game for trying too hard (and somehow not enough at the same time) at a single player experience. So many fighting games today are based solely on competitive play (as in tournament play) so at least they tried. I did a full review if you want to know my full thoughts on it. It's a lot more in depth than "Pokemon is fun and now they can beat each other up in real time!"
https://vid.me/1K9x
DONKEY KONG 64 (N64, 1999)
This one is a bit of a cheat. I technically did play this when I was a kid but it was only multiplayer mode and I was six years old at the time so I didn't get super into it. Now as an adult, I'm even more into it and feel like I'm experiencing a whole different game. Donkey Kong 64 is one of those platformer's platformers. Take for example the difference between Super Mario Galaxy and Super Mario Galaxy 2. Super Mario Galaxy is a beautiful game and playing it is fun and satisfying but even it's more difficult moments aren't going to make you break a sweat by the time you get to that point in the game. Super Mario Galaxy 2 might seem like a bit more of a cash-in but its design is what separates it from the original, giving an all new worthy challenge to veterans of the previous game and platformers in general. Donkey Kong 64, in this case, is like Banjo-Kazooie on every drug you can think of. Does this make it better than Banjo-Kazooie? Not necessarily. But Donkey Kong 64 is a platformer based on collecting that also has a focus on guns and puzzles. It goes from fast, heart-pumping combat to slow intricate puzzles in mere seconds. Donkey Kong 64 is such an anomaly in the platforming community that beyond this, I have to say just play it for yourself. It would take a 10-minute video to fully convey how I feel about this game (wink, wink).
SHOVEL KNIGHT (Wii U, 2014)
Another game that I played way later than everyone else. I really like this game. I think it's overrated, but that's only because it is seen as the new Super Mario Bros. in terms of hype. The hype is justified in a lot of ways though and Shovel Knight is an incredible game. Even for a platformer of its kind, Shovel Knight has a lot of reasons to revisit the game. Now the developers have also released a free second story where you play as one of the villains, and he controls so differently that it feels like a whole other game. They are also releasing another 3rd story and co-op (among other features) soon, so there is absolutely no time like the present to try out this weird orgy between Mega Man, Duck Tales, and Dark Souls.
PS. I reviewed this game too:
https://vid.me/IdSx
DIGIMON STORY: CYBER SLEUTH (PS4, 2015-2016)
I know. It's a Digimon game. It's supposed to be mediocre. Nope. Digimon Story: Cyber Sleuth is actually a well-designed turn-based RPG with incredible writing and delightfully stylized visuals. Without spoiling the game, I still technically haven't beaten it because the last segment of the game breaks the difficulty curve quite a bit, but ultimately Digimon Story is one of the rare RPG's where grinding in moderate doses doesn't feel like a chore and has a wide array of side-quests that encourage grinding in a fun way without seeming like pure filler content. You want to take all of those side-quests because you are raising six badass Digimon in your party, as well as thirteen others back at the farm while another eleven in the farm are crafting items for you and five more are seeking out more missions for you. God, I really want to get back into this game, but I have so many more I haven't beaten. *stares at unfinished copies of Final Fantasy XIII and Final Fantasy X/X-2 HD on shelf*
KINGDOM HEARTS: BIRTH BY SLEEP FINAL MIX (PS3, 2014)
I'm one of those Kingdom Hearts fans. One of those. I played every game except for any iteration of Coded and never got around to Birth By Sleep because that would have required me to buy a PSP solely for Birth By Sleep. So I bought Kingdom Hearts HD 2.5 solely for BBS (still haven't played the remaster of II) and I believe BBS is one of the best in series. The story is shorter for the sake of it being a handheld game but there are three separate characters and each of them have a unique plot that develops each character, and solidifies each character even more if you play all three. This already adds up to a whole experience and the replay value is set up so tastefully in this way that you will want to pick up all the items along the way for the sake of some form of completion. The true ending that you get by beating all three stories also leads directly into Kingdom Hearts 2.8: A Fragmentary Passage so if you're a fan or just now getting into the series, Birth By Sleep has an awesome combat system and feels like less of a chore than previous installments with far less grinding. Birth By Sleep is so smooth and fun that it probably wouldn't be the worst place for a newbie to the series to start, and it's slightly appropriate because BBS is a prequel to the entire series. You still won't know what the hell is going on yet, but not a bad place to start since the plot is mostly self-contained.
UNCHARTED 4: A THIEF'S END (PS4, 2016)
Make fun of me. I deserve it. I keep trying to think my way out of it but if I'm going to be honest with myself, the most fun and thought-provoking time I had with a game this year was with Uncharted 4, hands down. Uncharted 4 is proof that you can have a successful, plot-driven game series and still take new installments in different directions. I'm not saying Uncharted 4 is better than all of the other games. I get why people complain about Uncharted 4 and think it's "boring". I'm a fan of the series and I can still see its faults, for example I don't think Uncharted 1 has aged very well despite only being about 10 years old. Uncharted 4 is a lot more cinematic than previous games in the franchise, but its action segments make the story feel rewarding and bring out tension in the story in such a theatrical way that I think this game shows that a cinematic game doesn't have to be formulaic. The game isn't about pretty cutscenes, even though it has them, it's about telling a story based on a weary adventurer trying to live a normal life, and in this sense, Uncharted 4 shows sides of the series never seen before in the entire franchise, which makes it a risky new experience, but probably my second favorite in the series (keeping in mind I'm not super into shooters either). Uncharted 4 and the upcoming Kingdom Hearts III are the only reasons I got a PS4, and looking back on the times I have already come back to Uncharted 4's world with a grin solidify for me that I don't regret a dime. I'm not saying Uncharted 4 is a great enough game to spend over $300 on, but it's really good. If you're a fan of Uncharted or Naughty Dog, get a PS4 and get this game.
That's the list. Thanks for reading my brief thoughts on a list of goofy games. Not to keep plugging my channel but hey, I also reviewed Uncharted 4 too so I'll link it below:
https://vid.me/K0eF
Bye now, kids!
SLY COOPER: THIEVES IN TIME (PS3, 2013)
On my channel I reviewed the original Sly Cooper trilogy and felt lazy not doing Thieves in Time. I borrowed a copy from my friend and although I haven't finished the review for the game, I will come out and say that I actually enjoyed it a lot. I gave a pretty harsh review on Sly 2 and Sly 3 for their tedium and strange design choices. Sly 4 got rid of a lot of that. Since Sly 2 and 3 were walking on a thin line between monotony and quick strategy anyways, the changes were subtle but important. Not a lot of 3D platformers come out anymore due to the trend of 2D procedural generation games out now, so Thieves in Time was refreshing and although it's an unpopular opinion it might be my favorite in the franchise. I don't know though, Sly 1 was pretty cool.
ARAGAMI (PC, 2016)
At the end of 2016, I started getting into Steam, and my friends and I were looking for games to play online together since I might be moving away from their area fairly soon. I convinced my friends to try out Aragami since I was instantly drawn to its art style (and most of what they were suggesting were games that I wasn't very interested in, i.e. bland pseudo-realism shooters and horror games). I'm not super into PC gaming but Aragami, of all games, showed me its power. Aragami is a plot-centered stealth game, but instead of taking out bad guys with a gun in a boring industrial building, Aragami is set in lush cel-shaded environments and your primary weapon is a sword. You play as a mysterious creature called an Aragami who has been summoned by a captured princess to save her from her prison. Aragami has the typical WASD movement key binding of most PC games with shift sprinting and control crouching, but the space bar is used for certain shadow-based abilities that your character can use. The reason this works so well on PC is that you can aim with a mouse. Obviously you don't need to aim your sword but you can use shadow abilities to teleport to darker areas in your field of vision, even if it means scaling a wall. Speed and precision in your methods are crucial and this is so easy to do with a mouse that I can't fathom using a controller. Also Aragami is really pretty, has a fun enough plot, and is surprisingly fun to play co-op (two of you are Aragamis and you go through the story together). Aragami: it's pretty cool. There's an in-depth review.
SUPER MONKEY BALL (GC, 2001)
I have been playing Super Monkey Ball 2 for years but never owned a copy, just kept borrowing it from family. My sister ordered Super Monkey Ball for me as a Christmas gift (fun story, she thought she ordered SMB2 but the cover art is nearly identical so accidentally got me SMB1, but I'm not complaining). Super Monkey Ball is one of the first true physics-based puzzle games, or at least the first I'm aware of, and it plays as such. You push a monkey through various puzzles set up by the game in a certain order and see how far you can make it. Each puzzle gives you either 30 or 60 seconds to get to the goal, ramping up in difficulty (in theory) as you progress. Super Monkey Ball doesn't have as many memorable or impressive stages as Super Monkey Ball 2 does but it has tighter cornering which can be the difference between life and death when your main character moves in a big slippery ball. Admittedly, I also come back to Super Monkey Ball for the mini-games. I am significantly better at Monkey Billiards than I am at real life billiards.
BATTLEBLOCK THEATER (PC, 2013-2014)
Yeah, I just now got around to BattleBlock Theater. Another steam purchase that I have been meaning to try out for a long time and since it was on sale (bundled with Castle Crashers as well) I just decided to go for it. I have not been this pleasantly surprised with a 2D platformer in a long time. BattleBlock Theater is essentially LittleBigPlanet but more engaging and action-heavy. This isn't to say that it is better than the LittleBigPlanet games, just different. I always explain it to my friends that way and they think I'm saying that LittleBigPlanet blows in comparison to BattleBlock Theater and that is absolutely not what I'm trying to say. That's just like comparing different kinds of apples. BattleBlock's narrator is Will Stamper (Fairy Wish Prince, PeePee's Gay House, Potato Salad) which makes the game even more enjoyable for me. This was one of my main drawing points to the game, which is sad, but it absolutely brings a whole new personality to the game. Even without Stamper or the hilarious dialogue in general, BattleBlock Theater still looks like BattleBlock Theater. It's a unique and cutthroat experience that I recommend to everyone with a Steam account who likes pissing off their friends. BattleBlock is enjoyable alone as well, don't get me wrong. A lot of multiplayer games focus on multiplayer and disregard solo play, and other games do the exact opposite. BattleBlock is obviously more open for multiplayer but accommodates both.
POKKEN TOURNAMENT (Wii U, 2016)
Pokken Tournament is the answer to all of the Pokemon fans who have been asking for a game where you can have active combat with Pokemon, except made by the creators of Tekken. Pokken in this case is as simple or technical as you make it in a way. Going in blind is fun, but knowing a character forwards and backwards is also beneficial, and it can honestly be played either way. The story mode blows, plain and simple, but the gameplay is so well-designed and fun that I can't knock the game for trying too hard (and somehow not enough at the same time) at a single player experience. So many fighting games today are based solely on competitive play (as in tournament play) so at least they tried. I did a full review if you want to know my full thoughts on it. It's a lot more in depth than "Pokemon is fun and now they can beat each other up in real time!"
https://vid.me/1K9x
DONKEY KONG 64 (N64, 1999)
This one is a bit of a cheat. I technically did play this when I was a kid but it was only multiplayer mode and I was six years old at the time so I didn't get super into it. Now as an adult, I'm even more into it and feel like I'm experiencing a whole different game. Donkey Kong 64 is one of those platformer's platformers. Take for example the difference between Super Mario Galaxy and Super Mario Galaxy 2. Super Mario Galaxy is a beautiful game and playing it is fun and satisfying but even it's more difficult moments aren't going to make you break a sweat by the time you get to that point in the game. Super Mario Galaxy 2 might seem like a bit more of a cash-in but its design is what separates it from the original, giving an all new worthy challenge to veterans of the previous game and platformers in general. Donkey Kong 64, in this case, is like Banjo-Kazooie on every drug you can think of. Does this make it better than Banjo-Kazooie? Not necessarily. But Donkey Kong 64 is a platformer based on collecting that also has a focus on guns and puzzles. It goes from fast, heart-pumping combat to slow intricate puzzles in mere seconds. Donkey Kong 64 is such an anomaly in the platforming community that beyond this, I have to say just play it for yourself. It would take a 10-minute video to fully convey how I feel about this game (wink, wink).
SHOVEL KNIGHT (Wii U, 2014)
Another game that I played way later than everyone else. I really like this game. I think it's overrated, but that's only because it is seen as the new Super Mario Bros. in terms of hype. The hype is justified in a lot of ways though and Shovel Knight is an incredible game. Even for a platformer of its kind, Shovel Knight has a lot of reasons to revisit the game. Now the developers have also released a free second story where you play as one of the villains, and he controls so differently that it feels like a whole other game. They are also releasing another 3rd story and co-op (among other features) soon, so there is absolutely no time like the present to try out this weird orgy between Mega Man, Duck Tales, and Dark Souls.
PS. I reviewed this game too:
https://vid.me/IdSx
DIGIMON STORY: CYBER SLEUTH (PS4, 2015-2016)
I know. It's a Digimon game. It's supposed to be mediocre. Nope. Digimon Story: Cyber Sleuth is actually a well-designed turn-based RPG with incredible writing and delightfully stylized visuals. Without spoiling the game, I still technically haven't beaten it because the last segment of the game breaks the difficulty curve quite a bit, but ultimately Digimon Story is one of the rare RPG's where grinding in moderate doses doesn't feel like a chore and has a wide array of side-quests that encourage grinding in a fun way without seeming like pure filler content. You want to take all of those side-quests because you are raising six badass Digimon in your party, as well as thirteen others back at the farm while another eleven in the farm are crafting items for you and five more are seeking out more missions for you. God, I really want to get back into this game, but I have so many more I haven't beaten. *stares at unfinished copies of Final Fantasy XIII and Final Fantasy X/X-2 HD on shelf*
KINGDOM HEARTS: BIRTH BY SLEEP FINAL MIX (PS3, 2014)
I'm one of those Kingdom Hearts fans. One of those. I played every game except for any iteration of Coded and never got around to Birth By Sleep because that would have required me to buy a PSP solely for Birth By Sleep. So I bought Kingdom Hearts HD 2.5 solely for BBS (still haven't played the remaster of II) and I believe BBS is one of the best in series. The story is shorter for the sake of it being a handheld game but there are three separate characters and each of them have a unique plot that develops each character, and solidifies each character even more if you play all three. This already adds up to a whole experience and the replay value is set up so tastefully in this way that you will want to pick up all the items along the way for the sake of some form of completion. The true ending that you get by beating all three stories also leads directly into Kingdom Hearts 2.8: A Fragmentary Passage so if you're a fan or just now getting into the series, Birth By Sleep has an awesome combat system and feels like less of a chore than previous installments with far less grinding. Birth By Sleep is so smooth and fun that it probably wouldn't be the worst place for a newbie to the series to start, and it's slightly appropriate because BBS is a prequel to the entire series. You still won't know what the hell is going on yet, but not a bad place to start since the plot is mostly self-contained.
UNCHARTED 4: A THIEF'S END (PS4, 2016)
Make fun of me. I deserve it. I keep trying to think my way out of it but if I'm going to be honest with myself, the most fun and thought-provoking time I had with a game this year was with Uncharted 4, hands down. Uncharted 4 is proof that you can have a successful, plot-driven game series and still take new installments in different directions. I'm not saying Uncharted 4 is better than all of the other games. I get why people complain about Uncharted 4 and think it's "boring". I'm a fan of the series and I can still see its faults, for example I don't think Uncharted 1 has aged very well despite only being about 10 years old. Uncharted 4 is a lot more cinematic than previous games in the franchise, but its action segments make the story feel rewarding and bring out tension in the story in such a theatrical way that I think this game shows that a cinematic game doesn't have to be formulaic. The game isn't about pretty cutscenes, even though it has them, it's about telling a story based on a weary adventurer trying to live a normal life, and in this sense, Uncharted 4 shows sides of the series never seen before in the entire franchise, which makes it a risky new experience, but probably my second favorite in the series (keeping in mind I'm not super into shooters either). Uncharted 4 and the upcoming Kingdom Hearts III are the only reasons I got a PS4, and looking back on the times I have already come back to Uncharted 4's world with a grin solidify for me that I don't regret a dime. I'm not saying Uncharted 4 is a great enough game to spend over $300 on, but it's really good. If you're a fan of Uncharted or Naughty Dog, get a PS4 and get this game.
That's the list. Thanks for reading my brief thoughts on a list of goofy games. Not to keep plugging my channel but hey, I also reviewed Uncharted 4 too so I'll link it below:
https://vid.me/K0eF
Bye now, kids!
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