12/01/2017

"Only Games I Give a Crap About in 2017" Revisited

I just stumbled on an old post I made about games that were coming out this year and how interested I was to see where they would go. Here's an update on those since a lot of them are out now.

NIDHOGG 2
Didn't bother. It looks like Nidhogg with uglier graphics. There are notable changes, but I really don't care enough.

PROJECT SONIC 2017
Sonic Forces.... nope... fuck all that shit. I haven't played it. I have no desire to. I think even if you are a Sonic fan, you know why and have to agree that it's at least fair. It is at least fair to assume that the game will make me angry and therefore you can't blame me for avoiding it.

MARVEL VS CAPCOM: INFINITE
Capcom can suck my dick. You have to pay like, what, $80 to have the game and all of its characters. But as a game, it looks too similar to MvC3 and I wasn't crazy about that one to begin with. This is really sad because MvC2 is one of my favorite fighting games ever and there are a lot of cool characters in Infinite. Too bad. Sorry, Capcom. You won't be stealing my lunch money this day!

THE LEGEND OF ZELDA: BREATH OF THE WILD
I didn't play much of it, but its fun (I played the Switch version). I don't think it is as good as people are saying it is, but I think that about every Zelda game because everyone pumps up the games to god tier. Breath of the Wild only pisses me off with its stamina system. I don't mind the food system. I like the weapon wearing system. The controls feel great. The visuals, frame rate drops aside, are great. It's really almost everything you could want in a Zelda game and I didn't care enough to buy it, but what little I did play was enjoyable. I think it is a worthy addition to the series. But I don't like Ocarina so I don't have the right to say that, do I? BRB, fucking myself.

SHINESS: THE LIGHTNING KINGDOM
I'm sorry, Shiness developers. I still haven't gotten around to this one, but I want to. I didn't want to get it on the recent Steam sale because if I finally get around to it, I want to do a full-price purchase or at least a very small discount.

KINGDOM HEARTS 2.8 HD FINAL CHAPTER PROLOGUE
No complaints here. The Dream Drop Distance remaster is really clean and fun and Fragmentary was fucking great. If KHIII is anything like Fragmentary, it will be my new favorite game in the franchise, barre none.

SONIC MANIA
Sonic Mania exceeded every expectation I had and it's still fun to fuck around with every once in a while now. It's not my favorite Sonic game, but it has a strong argument for the best. It was made by fans with a budget. In other words, it was made by people who actually gave a fuck. Play Sonic Mania. You can thank me later.

PIT PEOPLE
Yep. Still haven't played this one either. Whoops.

YOOKA-LAYLEE
What a huge damn disappointment. I don't completely hate Yooka-Laylee but at the same time fuck Yooka-Laylee and fuck me for being so excited for it in the first place. I feel violated by a green, personality-less chameleon...

KINGDOM HEARTS III
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Um... what other games came out in 2017 that I got and thought were fun?
SHOVEL KNIGHT: SPECTER OF TORMENT
This is one of my new favorite games ever. No, I'm not joking. It's fucking amazing. If you like platformers, you are doing yourself the biggest disservice by not playing Specter of Torment. It's worth the price of everything else you get by buying Shovel Knight. If they greedily released it as its own game, I would still buy it. It was free DLC. Fuck you, Yacht Club TAKE MY MONEY!!!

A HAT IN TIME
This is such a great game. I bought it day one as kind of a "fuck it, why not?" It is one of the best games I've ever played. I sound like Buzzfeed or something stupid right now but trust me, A Hat in Time is fantastic. It isn't super time-consuming either unless you are a mad-man like me and want to complete the game.

CRASH BANDICOOT N. SANE TRILOGY
Okay, I couldn't think of anything else. No, for real. I think N. Sane Trilogy is pointless. Crash 2 and Crash Warped are two of my favorite games of all time and I can say with certainty that the N. Sane versions are objectively worse. However, Crash 1 is a bit more of a gray area. There are many things that I personally believe were greatly improved with this bitch of a game. If you can find it pretty cheap, it might be worth it just to have a playable version of Crash 1?????????

HORIZON: ZERO DAWN
I didn't really like Horizon: Zero Dawn...


Yeah, that's it. What other games came out in 2017 that were super gosh dang dope?
Hopefully I'll do this next year too but honestly, meh. Kingdom Hearts III and Dissidia NT (and maybe The Last of Us Part II?) are the only games that strike my fancy coming out in 2018. Let me know if I'm missing something. Strike my fancy!

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